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Space. We know so little about it: we need it, we crave it, we hate it, we attempt to fill it, we pore and puzzle over it while we wait for impossible answers. It’s a welcomed guest and bogeyman at the same time. Yet no matter what we do to manipulate or understand it, space is.
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During this morning’s run, I was talking with my friend about the fear and frustration we’d both been feeling about St. Louis, among other places. What can we do? we asked each other. If it came down to it, would we be able to stand against the ‘authorities’ armed with tear gas, guns, and hoses?
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Earlier this year I received a letter of congratulations from the company that hosts my website. The subject line went something like Happy Fourth Birthday to Honey Help YourSelf! They wanted to salute my efforts by offering me a handful of special discounts and services to mark the occasion. The message seemed odd to me at first, and then it got me thinking: When, exactly, did I start all of this? And more important: Why?
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Whenever I’m feeling stingy, flat, defeated or dead broke, it’s usually tied to an idea I’m holding about there not being enough to go around. Not enough money, love, time or opportunity, which means I have to keep what little I have to myself and ration it out in dribs and drabs because that’s all there is. Sounds kind of apocalyptic when I put it like that, but that’s exactly how it looks when we pinch life out in tiny increments. Sometimes it’s easy to go there, especially given the fluctuations of our bank accounts, the nature of our fear-based news media and the ongoing sense of competition created in the world around us. Toxic people don’t help much, either. But the truth is, there’s always plenty to go around, even though it’s not always so obvious.
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